Fun-Fueled-Experiences

If you have contacted both of your parents by 10:30 a.m. for advice, you're probably in a pickle.

Today, for example, I called my Dad at 10:10 a.m. and immediately began the following G-chat with my Mom at 10:25 a.m.: 

me:  you probably don't have these moments very often anymore.... but do you remember the feeling of thinking "hmmm...I probably shouldn't do this", but you do it anyway?

Val:  I'm afraid to ask...what did you do?

So, as most of you are probably wondering, what did I do this morning?

I'm proud to announce that as I type I am in the midst of not one but TWO "hmmm.. I probably shouldn't do this"

moments.  To begin, I made the mistake of gambling with a gas tank.  In hindsight, I'm not really sure why I decided to gamble in the first place.  I've lost countless Packers bets this past year alone and won thirty-nine cents my last trip to the casino, but I guess you could say the temperature rising above zero had me feeling lucky.  Needless to say, I came back to my car after letting it "warm up" for 15 minutes to find the only sound coming from my Sebring, normally growling with excitement through her muffler each morning, was the radio blaring inside her poor, lifeless shell.

I cannot say for sure why I spent the next 10 minutes sitting alone in my car listening to the radio, as if i was in shock that this car, this beautiful automobile that has accompanied me on so many free spirited-adventures and  last-minute road trips over the course of our five year friendship, couldn't actually run on fumes alone. Hmm.  In that moment, alone in my parking lot, I pondered my next move.  And by pondered my next move I mean checked Facebook and listened to the radio for a few minutes in hopes that the answer to my problems would pop up in a status update from Clay Matthews saying "On my way to Iowa City to rescue Jaclynn and then cuddle the day away with her."  Sadly, I am brought back to the real world when I catch a glimpse of a disgusting stray cat meandering from the dumpsters towards my car.  Alright, time to get moving there are real problems at hand.  Cats are gross and my car won't start.

My first call goes out to who else but 'Mopar Mike', the Sebring's primary care physician and also my Dad.  He gives me two specific instructions: get a 5-gallon gas can don't try to start your car right away after you've filled it with gas.  "Got it," I try to say as confidently as possible as I'm racking my brain trying to figure out the hell is going to help me out of my very first Iowa City car emergency experience.  From experience, I knew this would be an experience in itself.  For example, when I popped my tire after running over a median in 2010, I called Phil.  When my tires almost fell off after not being properly fastened by their lug nuts in 2007, two kind old men on their smoke break outside an auto shop in Kiehler, Wisconsin got me on the road again.  In 2008, Jamie, Lacey, and the Valley West Mall security guard assisted me when I locked my keys in my car with the lights on at work and John Benigni escorted me 20-miles to retrieve my spare key after I locked my keys in my car as it was still running later that year. And for the sake of time and dignity, I will not mention name-by-name all the former boyfriends who have came to the rescue during my many car crises of times past.  So 2014, fresh off its debut, seems to be eager to introduce a new experience to the roster...but who will I call this time?  I'm not in Des Moines, Milwaukee, or Kiehler, Wisconsin anymore, still relatively new to Iowa City, and not fully ready to expose the few friends I have managed to acquire at school and work to the car-crisis-experience just yet.

Roughly 15 minutes later, my knight in a yellow-cab came to my rescue.  His name was Jorge, and he didn't know it then but he was about to add his name to my roster of car-crisis-experience-companions.  He greeted me with a smile, and in the short trip to Wal-Mart we made small talk about the weather and I filled him on my situation.  He pulls right up to the doors (VIP status), and as if he can sense from the front seat that I have no idea where to look for a gas can,  turns around and tells me exactly where to go when I get inside.  Thanks to Jorge's directions, I find the selection of gas cans with ease.  Hearing my dad's voice in my head, I spot the 5-gallon gas can I was directed to buy.  It seemed way too big and intimidating compared to its 2-gallon counterpart. Reaching for the more user-friendly 2-gallon gas can, I hear my own voice in my head saying for the second time this morning, "hmmm.. I probably shouldn't do this." I make my way to the check-out, snag a bag of M&M's, pay, and walk out with my brand new 2-gallon gas can.  I would later regret that decision.  The gas can selection of course...NOT the M&M's.

Two and a half hours later, two trips to the gas station, one bag of peanut M&M's, and one jump-start later the Sebring awoke from her dehydration-induced coma.  After an unsuccessful first attempt at reviving the Sebring with two-gallons of gas, I quickly got back on the phone to get Jorge, my knight in a yellow-cab back.  He arrived quickly, and like before greeted me with a big smile.  We already got the small talk out of the way on our first journey, so on our second trip we talked like old friends.  We talked about our families, dreams, and debated whether or not it was possible to get high off of gasoline fumes.  So, what did I learn from this experience?  Well, for starters...don't gamble.  Also, when Mopar Mike tells you to buy a 5-gallon gas can, you buy a 5 gallon gas can.   I learned that Jorge's dream is to open a hair salon in Iowa City and bring his wife to the United States from Brazil and most importantly there are some pretty incredible people out there who can turn a crisis into an experience to laugh and blog about.  It certainly isn't my first crisis and it won't be my last, but at the end of the day I am reminded that even though you start your day in a pickle, crying out to your parents for help you can still end your day high off gasoline fumes with a new friend, a new experience and a reminder that getting to where we need to be is half the fun. 

God Bless America and as my Dad's T-shirt reads: Mopar or No Car.        

      

Fish, birthdays, and technology.

Well, I successfully completed everyone's favorite week of school: syllabus week.  I can't tell you how glad I am to have fired up my car's frosty engine and exposed myself to the conditions of the second "polar vortex" so that I could have a syllabus read to me.  I think I got this down, but correct me if I'm wrong: don't cheat, don't plagerize, don't sexually harass one another, turn in your homework, and try to show up as much as possible.  

However, as the week warmed up my creativity followed suit by the time I got to my last class of the week.  After literally reading the syllabus word-for-word on Wednesday, today we graduated to icebreakers (another favorite among students) in my Media, Advertising, and Society class.  We went around the room telling the class our name, where we came from, what our major was, what we are passionate about, our most memorable advertisement, and our favorite app or technology.  I noticed three things as I listened to the first few introductions.  1)  I had only one thing in common with the majority of the class, a Communications Studies major, 2) I am not passionate about fashion, cooking, or working out, and 3) apparently I know nothing about new apps or technologies (not a huge shocker, but worth noting).

One girl rattled on about a wristband that documents her sleep patterns, another talked about an app that allows you to link and review old and new posts from different social media sites.  Now, call me crazy but I'm not so sure I would want to review what meal I posted to Instagram on May 10, 2012 and what emotion-laden status I followed it up on Facebook that same night after my boyfriend dumped me for being 'that girl' that Instagrammed my food.  In addition, I must be more frugal than I thought because I think spending $130 on a bracelet that informs you that you had a shitty night of sleep is kind of a waste of money.

Here is essentially how my introduction went: I'm Jaclynn Hanson.  I'm from Eagle Grove, Iowa (I'd imagine this invoked some confusion, as I did not list off a "suburb of Chicago" like the others).  I'm a Communication Studies major.  I'm passionate about birthdays (I'd couldn't take myself seriously if I said I was passionate about dogs, fashion, cooking, or working out).  The most memorable advertisement to me is the Filet'o'Fish commercial from McDonalds <<silence, blank stares>>  At this point, I go into panic mode...and start half singing half mumbling "gimme that filet 'o' fish.."  in a desperate attempt to get at least one head nod.  More silence. Well, I'm glad it only took two class meetings to have officially solidified my role in the class as the L-7 weenie (think Sandlot).  

So I have one last shot to redeem whatever is left of potential coolness by bragging about this cool app I know everything about.  I  thought about saying the navigation app on my phone but I'm guessing the majority of my class had a GPS as infants attached to their strollers.  Okay, my next favorite app...'calorie counter'. Real cool, Jaclynn.  What about my Packers app?  I rationalized that due to the fact that most of my class is from Illinois it was probably a little early  in the semester to make those kind of enemies.  I was stuck.  I simply could not compete with magical sleep bracelets or a social media embarassment-creater.  Preparing for the enivtable crash-and-burn of my introduction, I shrugged and spoke truthfully.  "My favorite technology is...Netflix."    

Minds: blown.  

Guess what three people after me listed as their favorite technology including the teacher?  Netflix.  I think I have redeemed myself and the Filet 'O' Fish anthem.

Jaclynn Hanson, Communication Studies major, not from Illinois, technology guru, lover of birthdays. Nice to meet you, class.  I hope this semester brings me knowledge of new and innovative technologies like Netflix and moves me to song like a singing fish nailed to a plaque.    

Never too old

Tomorrow I will begin my second semester at the University of Iowa.  Do I have my books yet? No.  Do I know where my classes are? Of course not.  Have I read those awful, incessant university e-mails for all those "incredibly important" announcements?  The answer to that one should be pretty obvious by now. How is a girl to concern herself with such petty "to-do's" when there are questions of real intellectual matter looming in front of me that carry with them an incredible weight.  A weight I have wrestled with for weeks to get to the core of.  These are the kinds of questions that require one to look deep into their soul to answer.

What am I going to wear to class tomorrow!? How will I top the Sesame Street shirt I donned the first day of last semester?! Ugh... these decisions are too much.  I need a Busch light. 

Okay, okay... all jokes aside, lets get real.  I'm a 26-year-old junior.  I won't have to try too hard to stand out in some way over the course of this next semester just as I managed to do last semester.  However, all those B-'s on my report card weren't earned in vain.  I managed to obtain some knowledge in the time spent spacing off during various lectures trying to figure out what the hell I was doing there in the first place.  I'm not ashamed to reveal my barely average collegiate status.  Not one bit.  Reason being...I'm fairly confident I scored above average in 'Surviving-your-first-semester-back-at-a-major-university-that-just-so-happened-to-be-dubbed-the-#1-party-school-when-your-a-little-older-and-you-don't-know-anybody---101.  As you may have guessed, the class was small and I wound up teaching the class myself most days.

The day before classes began last semester I was crouched in the corner of my tiny, dirty, boiling-hot apartment...sobbing.  I was staring at boxes of my things that were waiting to find their place in my new space and a boyfriend that was on his way out both figuratively and literally.  This wasn't my first move by any means, but this was the first time I had packed along with me a very realistic notion that it wasn't always going to be easy or fun.  

I found out I bombed my first test, but I laughed it off over wings and beer with Joey and DB.  I figured out that I needed to race my shared-wall-neighbor to sleep every night in order to beat his unbelievably loud snoring. I discovered having a fling with a football player is only as interesting
as who the person is off the field.  I became addicted to Pop-tarts and peanut M&M's...and only when checking out my U-bill learned how quickly they add up in dollars not to mention pounds.  I learned that having my parking ramp ticket stuck to my cell phone causes it to demagnetize...but only after two straight weeks of having to see the parking ramp attendant to manually calculate my totals.  He said he loved our visits, so I guess you could say he was my first friend in Iowa City.

     

Despite all the combinations of doubt and uncertainty I flooded myself with leading up to starting school again, I made it to class that first day.  I even made it to class a good majority of the rest of the semester.  I learned many new things in class that I will build upon this semester, but more importantly I learned that I could do it. Simple as that.  And when it's all said and done in December (pending a passing Spanish grade..eeek) will be the grade I'm the most proud of.  So here I am, the eve of my second semester sitting in the middle of my living room in my tiny, occasionally dirty apartment looking at all the things that have found their place in my tiny space and feeling incredibly grateful for the people, lessons, and events that have found their place in my life the past few months.  Get ready Sesame Street shirt, we've got some school to attend.